Board Thread:What Would You Do?/@comment-34263048-20180424175252/@comment-11882399-20180427164958

Unfortunately I'm a fan of careful planning.

Which means the two weeks pass and I do nothing but overthink.

Bad.

VERY BAD.

Two days later I'm cornered by my Gazer neighbor - dodging eye rays like a ninja on crack.

The funny thing is I'm not even afraid of her *form* - it's just her attitude that I hate.

Closing my eyes I decide to play it like a mad kamikaze and literally CHARGE at her, tackle her and press my lips on hers. What the hell, I'm gonna get raped, might as well show some goddamn initiative, no?

And that's when she first goes limp, then squeals and *clings* to me with arms, legs and tentacles. As soon as our lips part, she starts to profess her love in the lewdest way possible.

And while my mind i still on a WTF state, Little Miss Explosition informs me of her year of unrequited attraction and how *happy* she is that I finally noticed her. All while dry humping me. Joy.

Fast forward to a week and:

-She's installed herself in my house.

-Goes into defensive turret mode every time something even vaguely female comes closer than fifty meters

-Wants kids. Lots of kids.

Oh well. Face your fears, they say.