Talk:Mad Hatter/@comment-26219553-20150425113148/@comment-26106762-20150615231329

I realize I am a bit thirsty, so I might as well give it a go. I move my tea to the spot directly across from her, and sit down. I then look directly into her eyes. She looks a bit sheepish, shying away from my gaze.

"What are you doing, silent sir?" She continues to try to break my gaze, making comments on various objects and scenery to divert my gaze, but I continue. I then blink, for I am now certain of her intentions. I finally reply. "They say that the eyes are windows to the soul. In this case, your failure to return the stare suggests that you have something to hide, or that you're too embarassed or shy to return my stare. Your previous statement regarding your jabberwock friend leaving with her other half suggests that you view individuals as halves requiring mates. The absence of another male to take the place of your mate suggests that you are currently single." At this particularly harsh note, she winces. I continue. "Those two things together means that you are currently interested in finding such a mate, and since not too many come through Wonderland, you are interested in me." Her cheeks flush with red, and her smile has long since faded. She looks sad, and there are tears welling up in her eyes. I somehow manage to keep my face straight, even though I'm crying my eyes out in sympathy on the inside. "Your offer is declined." Both of us are now silent, looking away from each other. My Cheshire cat guide appears in the last empty seat. "Guys, guys. I just saw the honest couple ever. There was this Jabberwock, and she was like this, and her dude was all like, let me tell you. It was so intense." And she continued to rant about them for the rest of that awkward tea party.