User blog:Party Vanderbilt/Party's What Do Wonders - Kejourou Edition

Archived from the Kejourou page, originally in response to a "What Do You Do" scenario posted by Mad Larry, presented here in mostly unedited form:

"You are walking through a town when a pleasant scent tickles your nose.You follow it and you come upon a long haired beauty.She looks at you coyly then motions for you to come closer.As you look at her you get the urge to move closer.You realize that she may be the Kejourou the villagers warned you of.

What will you do?"

--

So after my encounter with the Ushi-Oni(who decided she wasn't really all that into me after she half-crushed the life out of me), I was told that there's a single Kejourou who'd been lurking about the town. I didn't know what a Kejourou was, but I knew that if it was anything even remotely like that giant, killer hug-machine, I wanted absolutely nothing to do with it.

Keeping that in mind, I packed my bags, gave a wave to the elderly innkeeper, and stepped out into the night. My assumption was that all the local mamono would be home with their husbands, and I still had goods to deliver to other villages.

Whistling to myself, I started to saunter down the main road. It was a nice night out. The stars were shining bright, and the temperature was absolutely perfect. Distracted as I was, I unfortunately did not notice when the main street branched off to the north, and I continued following a side street westward.

I found myself in a part of town that was bathed in eerie, almost blood red light. It kind of freaked me out at first until I realized it was just coming from the lamps. Evidently I'd wandered into the prostitution district.

Being the respectable merchant that I was, it wasn't proper for me to hang around in such an unseemly location, and I promptly turned myself around and started marching back the way I'd come. I didn't get far, though, before I saw...Her.

She was definitely one of the most beautiful women I'd ever seen, with her perfect form and long, silky hair, and my knees started to get weak as she giggled and motioned me towards her. Before I knew it, I was starting to take a step towards her.

Of course, it went downhill quick. Her hair started to...writhe. And wriggle. And sway. So I did what any sensible man would do in such a situation. I screamed. I screamed loudly. And the next thing I knew my leg was cocked up high in the air, ready to run.

Of course, naturally, before I could take off something grabbed ahold of my foot and jerked it out from under me. I fell hard on my chest, and looked back with eyes filled with terror, trying to see what had snagged me.

It was hair. Long, fine strands of hair combining together in a sort of rope-like tentacle. I screamed again and started scrambling, trying to pull myself free. My arms spun like windmills trying to find purchase, but I just kept slipping backwards, inch by inch.

I looked back, and she was just giggling. Evidently, the whole thing was remarkably funny to her. Bitch. Just as I was about to be pulled so close I'd have no chance of escaping, I managed to slip my foot loose.

Unfortunately, I lost my shoe in the doing, but I can guarantee you that shoe was the last thing on my mind. Once free, I just started running. I didn't know where I was running, just that I was.

Down every twist, every turn, every street and every alley I ran. I'd think I'd escaped her and stop to take a breath, but then I'd see a movement in the shadows, or I'd hear the rustle of a piece of cloth, and off I'd be again.

I don't know how long it took, but I eventually made it back to the inn. I rushed in, slammed the door shut behind me, and braced myself against it. The innkeeper, meanwhile, just shook her head. After a few moments, I started to calm down.

Then, the innkeeper handed me something.

"That nice lady over there," she said as she pointed to a frightingly familiar woman who was sitting on a bench at the end of the room with a slight blush and sweet smile on her face, "brought you this. She said you lost it when you met earlier."

I looked at the object the innkeeper had handed me (my shoe), and then over to the lady. She giggled. I fainted.

...I hate Zipangu a little more every day.