User blog:Redknight910/WWYD The Order or your Life Lanceblazer

I can't let this happen anymore. I wanted to fight monsters, not kill children or hapless villagers. I shoulder the soldier out of the way, grabbing the child and throwing them to the side. I raise my sword at the monster, only to hear the young boy scream. Turning my head I witness the fear in his eyes. I hesitate, and the monster runs.

It grabs the child and runs with him, and I give chase. I won't let a child be stolen and corrupted by such a foul creature. In my chase I get separated from my unit, ending up in a section of the city we've already passed through. The monster takes them into a burnt-out house. I follow them inside carefully. As I enter I hear footsteps above me. Ascending the stairs I spot a door slamming closed.

I approach slowly, not wanting to alert the monster, lest it do something to the boy. I check the door, and it's been blocked from the other side. I ram the door a few times and it comes loose. I step in, ready to fight off the monster, and am concerned by what I witness. The boy is standing in front of it, brandishing a sword far too large for a child.

""Stay back!" He shouts in a shaky voice, trying to wave the sword.

"I'm here to help you." I say calmly, lowering my sword.

"No!" He shouts again. "You just want to kill Fia! I'm not going to let you!" The monster is cowering behind him, it's a simple succubus, still but a child too, but it's control of the boy is considerable.

"That thing is a monster. It just wants to control you. You're nothing but a tool for it child." I step forward and he tries to raise the blade. When his young strength fails him, he grits his teeth and tries harder. With a sigh I step passed the boy, bringing my sword upon the monster.

"You will never hurt another again." I mutter to it, before the sound of rushing windsends me into a roll. I rise to see a man, wielding the sword the boy had been trying to carry.

"Run, both of you, run!" He shouts, staring me down. The two follow his orders, and I see a monster standing in the door, taking both of them and leaving.

"I will free you of that things will, sir." The man grunts at my words.

"You were about to kill my son's best friend. I'm not letting that happen." He charged me, and his skill with a blade was surprising. Not a match for a trained soldier, but this man was clearly a fighter. I prepared for a deathblow after parrying his strike when something struck my side, sending me tumbling.

I rolled to my feet and saw a succubus standing next to the man, a raipier in its hand.

"Naria, I told you to take the children and run." He growled.

"This man tried to kill my child. I wanted to make sure he was finished here." The two descended upon me in a flurry. Fighting the man had been simple, but this monster had all of the advantages its corrupt form allowed, from agility to its limited flight. I made a fine account of myself, but fell in the end.

First it was his blow, come from behind that left me off balance, then its stinging assault caught a gap in my armour, peircing a strap and my shoulder. The pain was surprisingly ignorable, but my limbs grew slightly heavier. From that moment, everything went downhill. Every blow it landed made my own movements more sluggish, and before long I collapsed.

I expected to awake in the Lady's embrace. Instead I found myself in rags, dragged along in a sling behind a cart and bound. When I looked upon my travel companions my heart sunk. Monsters, men and women all walked with the cart. When some noticed I was awake they gave me such looks of hate. They looked at me as though I was the monster.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I didn't bother to speak, since I feared what would happen to me if I made myself a nuisance. Instead I took stock of my surroundings. Many of those around me were armed with weapons clearly not made for them. Some even held my fellows weapons, the shining blades and hefty axes looking out of place among such a ragged bunch.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">And they were ragged. Many had wounds that were wrapped in cloth, and their clothing, even the usually imaculately clothed monsters, was torn and whethered.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Awake?" A feminine voice growled from above me. Looking up I came face-to-face with a werecat. I didn't say anything, but she gave me a cold grin.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Good. We'll deal with you after we make camp. Monsters should be dealt with quickly, afterall." With that it popped its head back into the cart. We went until sunset, and made camp deep in the woods, away from the roads. There was a lot of glares at me as they set up, and more than once I was kicked in passing.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">Once they were finished I was brought out of the sling I'd been laid in, a holstaur carrying my tied form over to the fire. There it dropped me so that I was facing a succubus, sitting in a position of power among the others.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"The soldier Naria brought us. Tell me, do you know why you were spared?" It spoke with an age hidden by its monstrous body.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"So that I can be used to betray my friends? So that you can corrupt me and turn me against them?" The monster huffed in annoyance.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Of course you would think as such. It is what your kind do. No, we do not wish you to return to your fellows as our spy. Sathak, step forth." The man who'd fought me stepped in from behind the monster. "Sathak says that you refused to slay his son. Why?" I looked at the man, his face bore the same hate as all the others, except with a strong anger mixed with it.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"The boy was still pure. He was simply fooled by your kind." At this the succubus smiled, oddly kind.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"You believe we are the evil ones, then?" I nod, "Then let me ask, who was it, that destroyed an entire village? A village, founded in friendship with my kind? A village of hard working, honest men, women, and children?" She raises her voice slightly, "Who was it, that murdered, in cold blood, fathers, mothers, sons and daughters?! You call us the monsters, but what have we done, as a town, that was monstrous?!"

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I remember the battle. We blew through the small town's warriors in quick fashion, they were far from skilled enough to outmatch us. We set houses alight before their occupants could even begin to react, and slaughtered those who emerged. We were ruthless before the corrupt, before the town that had been seeded by monsters.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">But had we been right?

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I see doubt in your face. Tell me, how many died by your hand?" She wasn't hateful or angry in her question. If anything she was... sad.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Four monsters, and two men." She nodded slowly.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Do you know how many of us were killed?" I dreaded to know, but still answered.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Yes."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Fourty-eight, from a town of ninty-four. Half of my people. Many families, were slain. Do you fell you have done well by your Order?

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I know I've done right by the order. I've done as demanded by the Chief God. Haven't I? I've done everything we've been told to do by her, yet why do I feel regret at my actions? Have I been affected by the monsters presance? I feel regret for my actions at the village, for killing those men. Even the monsters I slew. I recall their faces, full of terror, and can't help but regret my actions.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"You know what you have done is wrong, don't you?" I nod slowly. I can't bring myself to talk.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Would you be willing to aid us in escaping your fellow soldiers? We fear they chase us." I look up at her, and around at the others. It's clear many would rather slit my throat and be done with me, but some are starting to soften.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"They won't be chasing you. They'll search for any survivors in the village. Every house, every stone, every hole. If anyone was left behind, they'll find them. But then they'll begin rebuiling. The engineers will come in and begin work on strong walls and stronger defences. They'll build their own town on the ashes and bones of your own. It's how we deal with unprotected towns, we destroy it, build our own, and claim territory. All in preperation for the next war." Many are both shocked and horrified by my words, but the leader is calm.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Yes, I know all too well how the ones you serve expand their lands. I have seen it before, and when they reach a place that is not simply pushed over, they declare war."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"How do they convince you this is right?!" One woman yells. "To drive people from their homes that you may have them?!"

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"We march because you are monsters, or in league with monsters. After what happened at Lescatie, many in the order have become desperate. We've been rallied into believing if we do not strike first, then we will pay the price." I think about the way it all works. We think they are evil, we fear them, so we attack before they can. And the innocents pay for our fear.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"That is how everyone feels. The Order, the Radicals. When two armies clash with fear as their drive, we see death by the hundreds. Nothing is more fearsome, than an army in fear." I look to the monster, and only now begin to take in her features. Her face is gentle, warm and, now that I bother to look, scarred. The scars are light, not obvious, but present all the same.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I won't go back to fighting in fear." All eyes turn to me "I'll fight for a home, I'll teach others as best I can. If you'll let me go, I'll find something to truly defend." The succubus gives me a warm smile.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Would you consider coming with us? To make your home with monsters, and to aid us in our struggles against those who would see us suffer?" I look over the crowd. Some are still angry, or hateful, but many are simply sad. I'm just as fooled as I thought these humans were. Shown a way and told it was right.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I couldn't do that. To make my home among you, forever reminding you of the day you all lost so much? No, I refuse to put you through that."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Us, or yourself?" I look and spot the werecat, one of the few still angry at me. Then I remember, one of the monsters I killed was a werecat.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Would you tolerate the man who slew your mother or your daughter to live among you? To know your neighbor was a murderer?" She glares at me for a few seconds, before nodding.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I would. Because then I'd know who to throw in front of the soldiers coming for me." I can't help but smile at the thought, of being thrown before the men I once fought with, of defending monsters against my former brethren.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"If no one objects to having me, I will take a place among you." Many looked to their neighbors, trying to decide my fate. No one spoke up in denial.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"It is decided then. You will join us as our guard captain. Untie him." People are hesitant. All this talk of forgivness is easy, but to actually comit to it? I wouldn't have blamed them for leaving me tied up. But, eventually one of the mn unties my bonds, letting first my legs, then my arms free.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">I stand, many hands on hilts, prepared to draw weapons. Instead I kneel, head bowed, and ask for forgivness. The werecat approaches me, and lifts my head to look at her face.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Do you see her?" She asks. I hadn't spent much time looking at the monsters I'd slain, but the eyes, the hair colour, even the sun kissed skin was the same. I nod.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"You look much like her." Her lip curled in a snarl as I mentioned the woman I'd slain.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Good. Because I'll be there to remind you of what you did." With that she drops my face, letting my head fall.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Everyone should get some rest." The succubus said, standing and approaching me. "You will have first watch." I nodded, preparing for the long night ahead. For my entire watch the werecat joined me, sitting in angry silence. I knew why she was there, to ensure I didn't run or let them be ambushed, but I found her company less than distasteful. At one point she fell sleep, and I made sure to place a blanket over her.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">She cried and twitched in her sleep, occasional sobbing at what I could only imagine was her mothers death. Or her daughters. I was still unsure.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">When morning came I was at the front of the column, between two men, both burly workers. The camp was packed up in short fashion, all evidence of the fire stamped out, and we returned to the road. The day was long, and the trip was exhausting for most of the villagers. More than once people ended up resting in the cart. We camped, we packed, we travelled. This continued for three days before anything came upon us.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">We continued down the road, only to find three trees felled across the road, a quick and simple roadblock. When some of the villagers approached to remove them, bandits sprung forth both from the block and the trees around us.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"You coins, please." Everyone looked between themselves.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"We've no money. We're running from..."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"If you've got no coin, then your not worth keeping around." One of the bandits moved in to attack the werecat, and I found myself falling into an old mindset. I stepped between the bandit and the villager, with no weapon or armour. The bandits laughed and tried to kill me first. I quickly disarmed and held the man, knife to his throat and arm twisted behind his back.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Let us go, or I'll kill more of you than we're worth." The men looked to the one who'd been talking, and after a few moments he nodded.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Fine, but the cart stays."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"It's only blankets."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"It. Stays." I looked at him for a long few moments, before pressing the knife harder into the bandit's throat.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"We keep the cart, you keep your lives. I promise, you'll find nothing but trouble with us." The bandit leader was starting to look angry.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Fine. Let them go, but he dies." And with those words, I'm surrounded, bandit's flanking me from every side. Before a battle can begin though, there's the sound of hooves. All the bandits look, then panic and flee, some even dropping their weapons. I shove the man I'm holding away and turn towards the new sound, picking up a rough wooden shield.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">The soldiers who approach don't bear order colours, and I spot a single monster among the sortie of five.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Ty, Oris, Nath, give chase. We'll handle this." Three of them, including the monster, nodded, charging off after the bandits.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Thank you, good sirs." The elder succubus approaches them.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"No thanks neccessary. Though names are, madam."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Of course, I am Selene Amora, leader of this band of refugees." I slip my newly acquired weapons into my belt, before approaching the men.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"How long have those bandit's been around?" I ask, getting curious looks from the two soldiers.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Too long. We're stretched thin with the recent influx of refugees. I take it you were assaulted by Order soldiers as well?" Selene nods.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Yes. I take it our journey will not end soon?" The man shakes his head, dismounting his horse.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Afraid not, ma'am. We have little room for refugees, I'm afraid. There is a town not far, though. You can get supplies and continue your journey from there." Selene nodded.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"What of Thalasia? Don't you have an alliance with them?" The captain looked at me for a time.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Yes. They are having difficulty with matters of royal ascension, however. As such we are alone in this as of current." I prayed this news didn't reach the Order soon. "How, may I ask, did you know of this?"

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"He was a soldier, before settling down in our vilage." The man nodded.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Under whose banner? Divas? Nerion? Or did you serve among our own soldiers?" I wasn't about to mention my origins, and so just accepted the first option.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Divas. I served during the battle of Drenos, before retiring in the village with these folk." He nodded, offering his hand.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Captain Rathos Malvore. These people were lucky to have you, if what I witnessed is any indication." I nodded, offering my own name and accepting the hand.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Sir. We should get going. As it is the others have probably chased them back to their lair." The captain turned to his man and nodded.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Of course, I pray we meet again. I'd love to hear of the stories from Divas." He mounted his horse and rode off again, leaving us on the road. After removing the trees from the road we continued on, thankfully the soldiers didn't meet us again.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">We reached the town before dusk, and rented an inn for the night. I was given my own room, thankfully. I tried to enjoy the comfortable bed, but was troubled by dreams, by images of the people I had killed, the looks of fear on their faces as I was struck repeatedly. A chant of 'monster' came, again and again, from everywhere at once. I woke with my heart racing, and a person in my room.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">It was the werecat. She was watching me closely from the small table.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Making sure I don't go anywhere?" I ask, trying to settle myself.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"No." There's a finality to it, but also hesitance. I look over at the table, and spot a knife sitting by her side.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"If you're going to do it, can you end me before I go back to sleep? I'd rather not invite the demons in my mind to attack again."

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"What do you see?" She asks, not moving from the table. I sit up in the bed, facing her. She's got a curious mix of frustration and sadness in her face.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I was being beaten. Kicked and punched and clawed. By the six people I killed. The same word keeps coming, over and over. Monster." I look to the window, thinking for a moment. Then the bed moves, and I turn back to see the girl sitting on the edge of the matress.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I've been having a nightmare too. I'm fighting, side-by-side with my mother. When I turn I just see a man standing over her. She's looking at me, shouting for me to run, but I just stand there. As the blade comes down, I scream and wake up." I don't know what to say to her, and she continues before I can think of something.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Then, tonight, it wasn't a soldier. It was that bandit. And as he was about to strike, you stopped him." I start hearing sobbing, and the instinct to put a hand on her shoulder comes in strong. As I do she glares at me, but doesn't shrug it off.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Why? Why couldn't you just be the monster I thought you were?" She cries, tears still flowing down her face. "Why did you have to be a good person? Why? Why...." She trails off, bending into my touch. We sit there, my hand on her shoulder and her holding her head against it, for almost an hour.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Why did you do it?" She whispered.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I thought it was right." She turned her head to look at me.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"And now?"

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Now I live with that. I live with knowing that I killed six people, who were probably better people than me. I live with it, and I do everything I can to protect others like them." She's silent for a time, then shuffles in and embraces me.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Could I stay here? The others don't like me crying in my sleep." I nod, letting her drag us down into a gentle spooning position. The rest of the night is full of calm nothingness. When we wake in the morning a woman is leaving a tray on the table. As I begin to stir she jumps.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Oh, my apologies, sir. I didn't mean to wake you." I tell her it's fine, when the warmth against me registers. Looking down I remember the conversation last night, and the slowly stirring werecat in my arms. When she looks at me, I think we share an expression. We quickly disentangle ourselves and make for the table. The silence is awkward, and long. Eventually I break it.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"About last night...." She groans and hangs her head.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I know. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have snuck in here." I shake my head quickly.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"No, I didn't mind. In fact, that was one of the better rests I've had. I just... wanted to make sure you were okay." She looked up at me, quietly mulling something over in her head.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Yeah. Last night was... the first night I haven't had a nightmare since we left." The silence returned until there was a knock at the door.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Get ready, we're leaving soon." It opened and Selene stepped in, holding something heavy, wrapped in blankets. "And I had something done for you...." She stops as she sees the werecat, who blushes profusely.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Um, I'll just... go." She quickly makes herself scarce, bolting out the door. Selene just smiles at me.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"Well, that puts my mind at ease. I was wondering where she went last night." She puts the load down on the bed, then unwraps the blankets. Inside is something I recognise immediately. My old armour, the white markings of the Order removed and the cloth over the chains dyed grey.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I had any trace of the Order removed from your equipment. now you can wear it without being assaulted by every passerby." I looked at her. Getting this done couldn't have been cheap. She just shrugs.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I've found having a man in armour tends to scare away bandits. You'll also need this, though." She hands me a sheathed sword, also mine.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I promise to protect these peopl, for as long as I live." I tell her, embracing her. She just chuckles.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">"I expected you would. And it seems people are quickly taking a shine to you." I blush at the tone of her voice.

<p style="font-weight:normal;">She leaves me to get ready, and after donning my old gear I step out into the hall. I meet them in the street, and more than a few smile as they see me. As we set off again, I can't help but notice the werecat is staying close to me as we move on. I hope I can be what she needs me to be, but this journey of ours is just begining, and I'll be damned if I let anything happen to them.