Thread:BTR180/@comment-27550231-20190730011226/@comment-28144855-20190929001251

Hey guys, your expertise is needed yet again. Lately there's been an increase in the vistitors traffic on my stories as well as mails sent to me asking will I continuewriting them. I don't know if you recall I don't have my Beta reader anymore since the kind girl(woman) had to quit due to RL which should by all accounts take precedence over fictional ones.

If I do decide to go trough with all that, then I want to write the best, most plausible, complex story, with both power and intelectual stuggles, as to me power alone is not a measure to OP nor the greatness of a character/setting/story. Of course, I'll have to find the right Beta that will work best in tandem with me which is not easy. There are tons of great Beta's out there, but I'd like to get a guy or gal that will complement me and my work if he/she spots any inconsistency, lack of explanations for things and similar problems in writing. Which means I need a lot of time just to convey them what I planned, what all means to me, the overall plot, twists and turns and whatnot, which is a chore in an of itself, not even counting writing it down, rewriting my drafts and all it goes along.

Anyways, since the the part I want to truly stick out in the story isn't yet shown 'on paper' I have time and more brainstorming to do before setting  for its 'final form' and publish it for the readers to enjoy.

I'm waighing between the main characters origins and backstory, Some of you know and/or heard of the Andrej Horvat that I use in my latest RP, no? That's the guy whose backstory I'd like to revisit and hear from you which would work best for what I wanted to express storywise. With either of the two the main story plot and its progression and flow remains fundamentaly unchanged,  but with each I can exploit different views on things like morality, duty and other yadda yaddas.

This is current backstory, a complete one at least the basics (shown and not published yet) for you to gauge and evaluate fully. The change as said earlier wont affect gretly the story other than in lesser details and quality.

A young boy from 'The World where the ones with potential are born' is the sole survivor from the onslaught of Aži Dahaka, controlled by his father Dahhak trough an amulet, an ancient relic. He gets saved by his Guardian Angel and they manage to escape. The Angel is a unique existence among the Angels as she's born from a Miracle after the God of the bible died. The Heaven's executives are not particularly fond of the girl, seeing her as a nuisance, a thorn in their sides, for both what she is. or rather how she's come into being and being jealous of the Heaven's sword choosing her over them to wield. They call her back instructing her to leave the boy to his fate as their kinds don't interact. She however refuses and buys enough time to entrust the youngster to people who will keep him safe, The Aesir god Odin, his wife Frigga and their sons. Being few years younger and perhaps due to the savior complex the boy develops a crush for the young Angel that saved him which is brought up by his brothers quite often as a way to tease him. He has by now grown into quite the powerful young man, however deep in his heart he harbours the sense of Vengeance towards the one who murdered his family and his driving force, the thing that keeps him going and growing in power. Learning all there was to learn by his adoptive family he is unsatisfied as it is not enough to face the Evil Dragon and get his revenge on him, so he decided to leave and look for more power elsewhere, his adoptive father telling him that he doing something stupid would bring his little Angel friend in great danger. With this he first finds a way to unbind himself from her as the guarded one, before he found a way to leave to world unknown. He however did a great miscalculation in the fact that the method he used to unbind himsef from his guardian didn't work both ways and the Angel is still his guardian. As he left, Heaven's executives took this as the opportunity to strip the girl of her status and cast her into the Underworld as a Fallen Angel.

Up to this point the story is unaltered but here is where my dilemma stems from. It's more retold for the sake of understanding the character as a means to tell which backsory better suits his tale.

Once he left his adoptive parents and siblings he traveled between many worlds and met as many people in his travels. His sense of vengeance not diminishing, same as his crush on the Angel. His sense of justice and morality he upholded growing up slowly began twist and warp into a malicus version. He like all boys grew up watching Anime, TV shows and whatnot so it was natural to have heroes he looked up for and admired. However in his quest for revenge that changed into something else entirely, obsession for power.

Here is where I wanted to make a change. What do you think it would work better?

From his point of view, I made his evil copy, basically an 'echo' of his own being an entity created by the very cosmos, as a means to balance, to defend itself, sort of a karmic justice that grew too powerful for the cosmos to contain until it finally frees itself from its control, appearing seconds after he enters a new Reality, every time growing stronger, more twisted but what's worse more tuned to him and his powers, making it a stronger and deadlier to face each time he reappears. However the truth of the Copy is different, Arael made it as a punishment for his evil deeds, with only way to beat him completely is a free willed act of selfish selfsacrifice, a test for Andrej to determine his potential as a Watcher candidate.

The other one involves timetravel as well, His Echo did not exist prior him appearing in the Fate Reality, (Fate Stay Night/UWB/Heavens Feel timeline) but following his 'Echo' in time and subsequently imprisoning it inside of his own self brought him 10 years in the past (Fate/Zero timeline). There he had to revert being a kid to facilitate the imprisonment of his mighty, evil foe. He learns that once he made contact with the manifestation of All the World's Evils separated all the evil in him up to that point and created the echo, but with his sealing it inside of him both the adult counterparts, the normal and his echo temporarily 'ceased to exist' with the exception of him and the one locked inside of him. Of course, This anomaly happened the night he started to see illyasviel as his little sister, instead of a tool to gain more power.

So what do you think? Which one work better? I can explain better specific story inner workings for anything that you folks don't understand or I failed to explain properly.