Board Thread:What Would You Do?/@comment-34263048-20181201061225/@comment-32042142-20181201174758

They are interessing stories, but, while I'm not a writer, I'm just going to allow myself a few critic here  ^^" :

ShadowHunter, is english your mother tongue? Because there is some grammatical mistake (or maybe I'm the one who misunderstand your sentences and theyr are correct ^^" ).

You seem to have wrote the dialogues indirectly, as there is no quotation marks nor line break, but the dialogue themselve are written mixing direct and indirect, it's a bit disturbing. Also some of your sentence seem a bit too long.

BigJohn2, your senteces are WAY too longs, you just keep extending them with an "and", it quickly become hard to read. In fact you abuse a lot of this word, even when it's not really needed. (Sometime you switch him for "so", but rarely) (You have the same problem ShadowHunter, but not as much pronounced).

I'm not saying yours stories were bad, but it's quite apparent you are not really used to write stories, so it's only natural. As I said, I'm not the best judge, I hope someone else more qualified than me will give his opinion. XD