Talk:Kikimora/@comment-26347931-20160408192012/@comment-27073023-20160411023507

After noticing the battered Kikimora with the "Will maid for shelter and food" sign, a light bulb appeared above my head and lit up brightly then went out. I looked up……. “What the!” then I smacked it and it came back on.

Without much thought, I swiftly grab the "Will maid for shelter and food" sign out of her hands and threw it on the ground just to stomp on it a couple of times…..1 *Stomp*…….2*Stomp*……3*Stomp; then spit on it *ptff* *ptff*.  ß  *insert anime face*

I looked back at her face only to see that her reaction of being appalled by my actions.

“What?......why?” she asked while being confused and slightly scared of my actions.

Without any words spoken to her to respond back with, I scoop her up as if she was a princess, smile at her and gave her the thumbs up and held on to her tightly in my grasp and carried her off.

As I was carrying her (she was heavy actually) she was docile at first because everything had happen so quickly, but I continued to walk down the streets, she started to make a scene.

(Thank God nobody was around)

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">She blushes and tries to struggle while being carried as I walk.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Let go of me you pervert!” she yelled at me.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">I got nervous while she was yelling and I scanned my surroundings with the quickness to make sure no one was around.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Calm down calm down, I’m not here to hurt you.” I tell her while shitting bricks.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Lair!” she yells and throws a fit whaling her arms.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">She then proceeds to pull out a paper fan and smacks me up side my head.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">(Where the hell did you get that!?)

<p class="MsoNormal">*SMACK!*

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Owe that hurt! quit smacking me! ack!”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">I put her down just to calm her down……….it didn’t work……she kept smacking me upside my.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Ahh help!” she screamed.

<p class="MsoNormal">*SMACK!*

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“ack!”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“PERVERT!” she yells again but with a megaphone.

<p class="MsoNormal">*SMACK!*

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Owe!”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">(What the!? Why do you have that?)

<p class="MsoNormal">*SMACK*

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">She then starts pulling out random objects and hitting me in the head with them.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">First shoe “Owe!”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">Then an umbrella “Ackk!

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">Then a random passing by kid hands her whip *Crack!* “AHHH!” (I’m not into this!)

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">Then she pulls a kitchen sink from underneath her dress “How in the…..” *KURBLONK!*

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">I’m on the ground beaten to a pulp with my hand reaching out to try to get away from her.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“I’m a defenseless monster! Help!” she says then pulls out a metal bat with nails glued on the tip.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">(AH COME ON! You got to be kidding me! I need help!)

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">She swings and the bat lands near my face putting a dent into the ground……..I turned pale blue.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Wait wait wait, you got it all wrong!”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">She then stops her assault and panicking and looks at me with distrust in her eyes.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Listen please don’t hurt me….I wasn’t trying to cause you any harm, I was just taking you up on your offering and taking you with me to go shopping.”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">She raises an eye brow at my words “Are you telling the truth?” she says to me in disbelief.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“I promise!”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Hmm then why then you snatched my sign out of my hand and through it on to the ground just to spit on it!? HUH?” she says to me with her face pressed against mines while having the bat next to my neck. I got nervous……I almost wet myself.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">Regaining my composure I explain why I did what I did.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“The reason why I did that was because that sign reminded me of the time when I got kicked out and abandoned by my foster parents. I was homeless and alone as a kid….I didn’t like it…..not one bit. I told myself I don’t ever want to go back to that and when I say your sign I was reminded of that time.”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">Her eyes widen.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Really!?” she asked in shock.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Yea, when I saw you sitting there with an expression of sadness and nowhere else to go…it struck a chord in me. I want to help this woman.”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">I look away and scratch my face “If you want you can stay with me and I’ll give you a nice warm home to live in, even though it’s not much and I live alone. Plus you can consider me family seeing is how you might not have any.” I then look back at her kind of embarrassed.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Really? You’d do that for me?” she says me with sparking anime puppy dog eyes while her tail was waging vigorously.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Yea, I also figured since you’re a maid, It would be nice having your services around. Plus I think you’re really cute too. I really don’t mind that you’re a monster, I’m not like others that judge.”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">Out of nowhere she pounces on to me and I we fall on to the ground. She nuzzles my face and wags her dog like tail in happiness.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Thank you sooo much…you’re the nicest person I’ve met, kind enough to take this filthy monster woman in and give her a home. I will serve you till my last breath master.” She says and continues to nuzzle me.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Ok ok, let’s get go shopping and get you home to a hot bath and a hot meal.”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Aye Master!” she says to me happily then kisses me on the lips.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">When lock lips for a moment and she pulls away.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“um……what?”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Well since we’re going to be living together, you’re going to my master and my husband now from now on.” She says to me happily.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Wait what!? Husband!? What happen to you just being a maid.”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">Gives me a anime death glare; smog come from out her mouth and flames of hades are in her eyes.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">‘HUH!” she spews out

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“uhhh………..what’s for dinner honey? I can’t wait to try your homemade cooking.” I say back to her in fear of her dark side.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">She goes back to normal with a smile on her face “Where having stewed dumplings today.” She tells me.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“Come on hubby let’s get to the store and get home quickly so I can feed you and shower up….I haven’t bathe in a few days and I want new cloth.”

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">(ugh….I wonder who’s the master now.)

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">She gleefully drags me off to the store while I’m on the ground with tears coming from my eyes.

<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size:12.0pt;line-height:115%;font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"">“What have I done to myself.”