Talk:Kunoichi/@comment-201.141.148.104-20160310181438/@comment-27950421-20160322234050

"So basically a Kunoichi marriage certificate?" I ask in deadpan.

"Yep, not that you would know that, I can't wait... to see you... in a panic..." says the Cheshire smugly before she hits that glorious moment of dawning comprehension that I so love.

I smile at her.

"HOW'D YOU KNOW ABOUT HOW KUNOICHI ASSASSINATIONS WORK!?!?!" She screams at me, infuriated that I one uped her.

I shrug, "Library, Monster Girl Encyclopedia. Besides while you've pulled some crazy shit on me before, getting me to sign my own death warrant seems like a bit much. Now getting me to think that I did while simultaneously getting me hitched to smexy ninja demon, that's something you would pull."

She stares at me angrily.

I frown, "Man... you really don't like it when I out wit you do you?"

"SHUT UP!" She yells before disappearing.

Later that night:

I'm laying in my bed, faking sleep and waiting for the kunoichi to show up. As can be expected, she silently fades in from the shadows before flinging a shutiken into my headboard. Roused from my "slumber", I sit up and look at her.

Her eyes glow menacingly with demonic energy as she walks towards me, "Reptile, I hope that have made peace with yourself for your time has come. You have been marked for assassination."

I yawn (faking being asleep is exhausting work after all), "Yeah, yeah lose the whole menacing executioner thing will ya?"

I am then treated to a sight few have ever seen, a Kunoichi triping and falling on her face.

She quickly scrambles to her feet, "Do you not understand? I'm here to assissinate you!"

I shrug, "Yeah which is basically you showing up, fucking me into submission, and then dragging me off to your ninja village."

"AND HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT!?!" She yells.

"It's all in the Monster Girl Encyclopedia," I say handing her a copy, "never knew a kunoichi would be so loud."

She snatches it out of my hands and quickly skims through it.

"Someone is going to pay dearly for leaking information like this..." she growls snapping the book shut, "and this book is way overdue."

I shrug, "So... can we skip the scary assassin thing and skip straighy to the sex part?"

She sighs, "Fine..."

She suddenly rips off her skimpy ninja outfit to reveal that she's somehow wearing an equally skimpy maid outfit under it, "How may I serve you Master?"