Board Thread:What Would You Do?/@comment-27950421-20180531194608/@comment-29325824-20180602191537

I just stand there incredibly confused. "How- what- why- ...I have so many questions!" I blurt out. "For one, with all due respect, why are you even here? I mean, this isn't even the right hemisphere." "Well," the president replies "you're normally not supposed to know this, but our Samari- I mean, NSA keeps tabs on everyone. Yes, everyone, even you." "Isn't that kinda a violation of international laws or something? Oh, oooooh, right." I say. "Exactly, since when has that ever stopped us before? Now may, I come in?"

So, after the Secret Service does a more than thorough inspection of my house, we get down to business. The president explains that my sense of reason, my various online activities, and me being what's called a "covert pervert" make me the chosen person for this mission. Also because, quite frankly, I could use a good deal like this.

"Alright, I accept, on a few conditions." I say. "For one, I want to be escorted at all times by one or more single Mamono species of my choice. Probably best an Automaton. Secondly, I want to be equipped with an emergency raging mushroom ration pack before I even leave. And thirdly, I want enough riches to be able to sustain myself there long enough until I can start making a decent living for myself. I also want my family to be compensated, and finally I want you to continue what you're doing and fix everything your predecessor got us into. Do we have a deal? Can you do that?" The president smiles widely and answers "Yes, we can!"

Within a few weeks, I'm preparing to depart through the starg- I mean, MGEgate and given a hero's salute. On the other side, I'm welcomed by a group of Dullahan, as well as an army of rather large Golems keeping numerous frantic single Mamono at bay. Nervously, I'm escorted to the embassy building, where an Automaton that's build rather suspiciously like my perfect woman is waiting for me. She walks up to me, frenches me, and then declares herself my undying servant and protector. "Perfect." I think. "Everything is going according to plan. Now, I just have to get myself a Cupid, Nurarihyon, and/or Hakutaku, and I can start collecting my very own harem. Hah! In your face, my former fellow MGE wiki'ers!"

P.S.: Hoped you caught a certain reference to a certain series I threw in here. No, not SG-1, the other one.