Board Thread:What Would You Do?/@comment-31401828-20170307145919/@comment-24664052-20170318064552

This is one of the many reasons why I quit the army, even if I don’t know what to do after that. All I have learned in my life is killing, killing, killing. I have been sent to places near and far, and scenes like this are just as frequent as fighting the enemy. My vision momentarily flashed back to a Werewolf family I bayoneted to death just because they spoke against the ruling regime. And many more others. Innocents. Until I couldn’t bear it any longer, but what I could do? Be a gunrunner, that’s what, since all what I learned to do is to fight and kill and use weapons. But now, I regret it.

Despite remaining stoic, my conscience bothered me. Even if death is a natural way of things, this kid deserves a normal life, that’s what my heart tells me. And why I left the army.

I regret having sold those weapons to the revolutionaries. I lived off the suffering of others. Because of me, this young one’s sister is going to die, leaving her all alone in this harsh world.

“Quick!” I lifted and carry the older Kikimora in my arms as I ran with her younger sister, away from the fields of battle, away from the city, away from everything, even having to shoot anyone who tried to stop us. I regret having to use my Colt revolver and kill someone in front of the kid. Eventually, we reach my safehouse, which is just outside the city. There I was able to administer first-aid medicine on the older Kikimora.

I don’t know where to take them, honestly. The hospitals had been ransacked, the police posts overran, and obviously the city in conflagration. I was never a medic, and I had only learned first aid, more of my comrades died of diseases than the enemy because first aid is the best thing we can do.

If I didn’t sold weapons to the rebels, the older one might have lived. In her last breath, she entrusted me her younger sister, and told me that I could be a good father. Fuck, I learned how to destroy, not to care. But this is all my fault, and this mistake is mine to correct. So I accepted and that I’ll be the one to take care of her younger sister after her death. Still, I didn’t know how to comfort the little one, and my heart broke seeing her younger sister pleading for her to wake up. Death may be a part of life, but why did it have to be?

But if there’s one positive thing the army taught me, it is to go on despite of your loss. Go on. Go on. Fight until the end. Seek all ways. Braving myself into immigrating to another peaceful country and starting a new life, I took on many jobs. Factory worker. Security guard. Store clerk. Real estate salesman. So that I could enter a new business and be self-sufficient in feeding myself and my precious little one. Despite all the ups and downs, despite all odds, eventually I came to the point that now I am a proud owner of forty apartment blocks, a grocery and a private security company, profiting enough that my precious little one could study as a doctor since she wanted to save people’s lives. So that people won’t have to undergo the same suffering that she—no, we went through.

Go on, my dear. Realize your dreams, chase your goals, fight on until you win. I’ll always be here for you.