User blog comment:The Reptile King/Reptile Kingdom What Do's/@comment-27950421-20171229161656/@comment-29435884-20180224034835

(don't worry fellas, I won't leave ya hanging. I wanna see the secret too!)

I feel existential horror to my core. A battle that cannot be won by mere men, faith and fury failing the Goddess' chosen. Truly this is a nightmare, the type of situation that veteran paladins speak of in hushed whispers. How am I, a mere squire going to face the dragon, this abomination, (this smoking hot piece of ass) wait a minute....what was that last bit?

Never mind, we'll just move on. Truly this will take all my interlect, the cunning of a fox to achieve. I wrack my brain for a solution, and this is what I come up with.

'I wonder if Sir Dumain will mind if I start calling him charlie?'

'Is Die Antwoord a joke band?'

'Who would win in a fight between Judge Dredd and Robocop?'

'Does the reptile kingdom do takeaway chinese? I could smash some sticky pork buns right now'

'Mmmm beer'

'Why is this monster just watching me monologue?'

Obviously, none of this is particularly helpful. But then, as all hope seems lost, and idea occurs. Find a new game. And so I pull a copy of RISK out of the bag of holding I totally had the whole time, trust me. I face the beast and with the strength of the goddess' favour and the hopes of humanity and all the ruined blueberry dresses that have ever been resting on my shoulders, I lay down my challenge. "I call the black army!"