Board Thread:What Would You Do?/@comment-31336039-20181120135102/@comment-28718853-20190125004513

Damnit!

Of all the things that I didn't want to happen this is number two in that list, the first being Matangos corrupting my nation of Duhrum. You and your big mouth Ilassa.

I pace back and forth in my office, the letter sitting on my desk in plain view. If that wild Lilim takes one step in Duhrum then it's all going to go downhill from there. So much work was done by me and the governors before me to bring the country to where it is today. Can't afford to let that all go to waste from the flings of one powerful succubus now.

There must be something I can do to prevent Duhrum from becoming another demon realm. Fighting her is a definite no. Bribes most likely won't succeed. Maybe...yes.

I snap my fingers at my eureka moment and step out of my office with the letter in hand. The two guards stationed outside my office stand firm as I approach my confused assistant Briar who asks me, "What is it my Lord?"

"This," I reply as I raise the letter to Briar's face.

"What is it?" Briar asks as he looks at the letter, unsure of what to make of it.

"Another diplomatic letter from Ilassa," I say.

Briar smiles and asks, "I assume that relations between the two of you are progressing smoothly?"

I nod and say, "Most definitely Briar but...it's about her sister Mari."

Briar's face grows nervous, and I can feel the worried expressions of the guards behind me after I mention that name.

"M-M-Mari?" Briar asks, hoping that he misheard me.

"Mari, one of Ilassa's sisters and one of the Lilim daughters of the Demon Lord," I respond, confirming with Briar that I had not misspoken.

Briar appears as if he wants to scream out in agony, but out of respect for his superior he maintains his cool and rants, "Mari is the most perverted Lilim of them all!  Her entering this country would spell disaster for us all!"

"I don't disagree with you there," I tell him. I then raise my hands in a relaxing gesture and say, "And before you ask, I did not request an audience with her.  Mari wanting to visit Durham is much thanks to Ilassa's bragging about our friendly relationship."

Briar sighs and places a hand on his wrinkly forehead. "It's always the powerful causing problems for us regular mortals," he mutters.

"I have an idea for how we can hopefully stop this," I say.

Briar looks at me trying to look hopeful, but deep down I can tell that he's doubtful of me.

"My lord, with all due respect Mari is a Lilim like Ilassa.  I doubt anything we try will convince her to leave our border, but I'll lend you my ear and hear your suggestion," Briar states.

I lean forward and ask in a serious tone, "Do you know a Hans Wentworth?"

Briar's eyes widen at me in disbelief.

__________

With guards at my side and Briar leading the way, we step into the local jail. A middle-aged woman behind a desk casts me a surprised look. It wasn't common for those in government positions to visit penal institutions. "May I help you Lord Uram?" the woman asks me.

I gesture to Briar, who steps up to the desk and says in a low voice, "Lord Uram wishes to see Hans Wentworth."

The woman is silent, instead nodding and motioning with her head to a man standing nearby to come on over.

The man steps up to me and says, "Follow me Lord Uram.  I'll arrange a meeting between you and Mr. Wentworth."

Twenty minutes later I'm in a small cold room with a prison guard in each corner. I sit at a stone table, awaiting the man. Briar stands behind me, a worried expression never leaving his face.

There is a creak and the door opens. The man I've been waiting for is ushered in by a guard with his wrists shackled together. The guard forces him down onto the chair opposite of mine and steps back.

Hans is no stranger to the prison system. This skinny man of 5'9 with a short black bowl cut and large blue eyes has been in the jailhouse countless times for various acts of perversion ranging from spying on them bathing in the hot springs to stealing their undergarments. While Hans is quite the deviant, he has never caused intentional harm to anyone. He probably  couldn't hold his own in a fight with his flimsy build. This makes him the perfect candidate for what I have planned.

"It's good to see you Mr. Wentworth," I begin with a smug grin. Hans has a confused look as I continue, "You have quite the list on you.  Your perverted behavior keeps landing you in here.  May I ask why you lack respect for the privacy of your victims?"

"I...I...I uhhh..." Hans utters, but I cut him off and add, "Better yet, why haven't you focused your depraved acts on the mamono?  I'm sure many of them crave a pair of eyes like yours."

"Y-you see sir..." Hans starts.

"Lord Uram," Briar warns as an attempt to maintain the societal hierarchy, but I make a hush gesture to him and tell Hans, "It's okay.  Continue."

"I'm more into human women sir.  Was never much of a mamono guy," Hans replies.

"I see..." I say as I cup my chin and assume the thinking pose, "Even though you prefer human women, perhaps there is a certain mamono out there that does have your interest."

"Well..." Hans mutters as he twiddles his thumbs, "I've always had a thing for Lilims.  I guess I'm into exotic women much like the bountiful beauties that go to the hot springs."

I chuckle at Hans' honesty and raise Ilassa's letter in front of him.

"W-what is that?" Hans inquires.

"You're into Lilims right?  How would you like to bang one?" I ask as my grin grows wider.

"Woah!  Is Ilassa actually coming here?" Hans asks with a hint of excitement in his voice.

I shake my head and say, "No, it's her sister Mari."

"Mari?  Is she the crazy one who is a huge pervert? Hans asks.

"She's the more promiscuous of the two yes," I reply.

"So ummm...why are you coming to me about this?  You're the leader of this country right?  Shouldn't you be seeing to it that Mari is taken care of?" Hans inquires.

"You're right, but therein lies the problem.  I don't want her entering Duhrum," I answer with a more serious tone.

"Huh, whaaa...?" Hans blurts out, shocked that I would turn down a Lilim such as Mari.

"Think about it.  Lilims have the power to turn entire countries into demon realms right?  So think of what would happen if Mari decided to turn Duhrum into a demon realm," I say.

"Uhhh..." Hans moans.

"Think of all of those beautiful women that you love to peep at.  That entire human element could go away in an instant.  Then you are left with monsters," I explain.

"No, not that!" Hans mutters, starting to realize the issue.

"Exactly.  Mari gets in, no more human women to ogle at," I state.

Hans shakes his head and says, "Damn it!  You have a plan for this right?"

I nod and say, "Yes, and you are going to be a part of it."

Hans' mouth falls agape and he lets out a shocked, "Wait!?  You want me to actually have sex with Mari!?"

"You said you like Lilims right?  Well, now's gonna be your chance to get laid by one," I tell him.

He seems like he wants to hesitate, but I can see the anticipation in his eyes.

"How exactly do you plan on making this work?  She's a Lilim, you're a Lord, I'm just a lowly squirt who lives on the coin," Hans tells me.

"My idea is this.  Ilassa has told her about me, but Mari doesn't know what I look like," I state.

I lean forward in my seat and add, "You're going to spend the day with her dressed as me."

"Wait a minute," Hans says, skepticism growing on his face, "Once Mari steps across the border it's over right?  What idea to you have to keep her from doing that?"

"Well..." I say and I twiddle my thumbs, for the first time doubting myself on my plan. Nevertheless, I press forward and reply, "Hopefully you give her such a good time that she loses interest in even coming in."

"I'm...sure your people have prepared the stuff necessary for this?" Hans asks me.

"Yes.  We have all that we need and an old house just outside of Duhrum is being renovated so that it will hopefully suit her needs," I explain.

"And...what am I getting out of this?  Don't get me wrong, I'm down for this but...there is some kind of reward I'll be getting here right?  I don't exactly like doing a job and not getting compensated for it," says Hans.

My head sways from side to side for a moment before I respond with, "Well, I could have the guards turn a blind eye to your perverted nature for a few months, you've been harmless enough.  Just be warned though that if you try to hurt anyone the law will not hesitate to put you down, and I doubt that anyone around here will miss you.  That's the best I can do."

Hans' eyes shift from left to right for several seconds as he enters a thinking pose. It seems like his answer is going to be obvious, but I give him time to decide. Finally, he looks up at me and says, "I'll do it.  Just tell me where and when."

"Excellent!  You will be updated with further instructions soon!" I beam as I gesture to the guards and say, "Uncuff him please."

One of the guards step forward and produce a bronze key. He slips it into the lock of Hans' shackles and there is a click, soon followed by his bindings popping open.

I could feel the uncertain eyes of Briar staring at me. I share his worries. If this plan fails I'm sure that the consequences are not going to be pretty.

__________

A few hours later I'm propped on a hill outside Duhrum overlooking the aforementioned house that shimmered like the living space of a well-pampered noble. I'm dressed like an adventurer as are my two bodyguards behind to ensure that we wouldn't be made out so easily. I observe Hans through my telescope dressed in fancy green clothes. He is clutching his collar nervously. I can't say I blame the man. After all, this IS a Lilim we're dealing with here.

Every second that ticks by feels like a minute. Every minute that goes by feels like an hour. Every hour that rolls by feels like a second.

I hope my scout delivered my new letter to her in time about the invitation for a date.

Finally, off in the distance I spot a woman. A gorgeous body, a simple white dress, purple hair, a white hat, red eyes with black sclera. Mari the Lilim has arrived. Her feline familiar flanks her side with a cheerful smile. Now we can only sit and wait.

Mari strolls up to Hans and although I can't hear them from this distance I can tell that they're having a friendly conversation. Hans opens the door to the house and Mari steps inside with her familiar behind her. Hans is the last to step in and shuts the door behind her. So far so good. She has taken the bait. Now to hope that the rest of my plan works out.

For an hour or so nothing happens.

Then, I see the windows flicker with a vivid pink glow. This is soon followed by the windows shattering and pink arcane wisp-like tentacles extending outward and flowing around the house. The structure itself begins to rattle from what I can see.

This spectacle continues for another hour until the smoke and the lights finally die down both inside and around the house.

The front door opens and Mari emerges with the unconscious body of Hans slumped over her shoulder. Her familiar floats alongside her and both seem quite satisfied. Hopefully it's enough to make Mari disinterested in entering Duhrum now.

The Lilim disappears in a puff of smoke with Hans and her familiar in tow. Seems that Hans has gotten luckier than he realized. Perhaps the women who regularly attend the hot springs won't have to worry about seeing him anymore.

"Hello!" announces a cheerful voice that startles me and causes me to bounce onto my back.

My two guards jump to their feet and draw their swords, but they freeze when we see who it is.

Mari herself standing over us with a devilish smile, Hans over her shoulder.

"Did you like our show?" she asks me.

"It was...quite the light show," I respond.

"Glad you enjoyed it Lord Uram," says Mari.

"Oh th-hold on, the one you're carrying is Lord Uram," I say as I point to Hans desperately trying to keep the ruse up.

"Oh don't be silly Lord Uram," Mari says as she sets Hans down onto the grass next to me. A wide grin is etched on his face and drool is seeping from his mouth.

"I knew this man wasn't you the moment I saw him, but I have to say, a man like that combined with those raging mushrooms stored in the bedroom really know how to give a pounding," the Lilim continues.

"B-b-b..." I utter, but Mari speaks on, "You think you're the only one with spies?"

I grow silent and gulp.

Mari begins to walk laps around me and says, "Just like you have men in my sister's nation to give you information on what she's doing, I have my ladies working undercover within your border who tell me and her exactly what's going on. Didn't think words of your plan would reach my ears?"

I finally give up and mutter, "Okay, you got me."

I gaze directly into her eyes and ask, "Are you...still going to enter Duhrum?"

Mari plants a finger on her chin and replies, "I was going to, but after my experience with your decoy, I pretty much have no interest in doing so now."

"Oh that's gre-I mean oh that's a shame," I say, struggling to play it off like I'm disappointed.

Mari's grin then turns sinister and she says, "I'm gonna have punish you for setting me up with that pervert though."

"Hold on!" I cry out as I stand up horrified, "I thought that your experience with him was amazing!"

"It was Lord Uram, but you could have done this whole thing yourself! You could have been the one leading the charge into me rather than letting some other man do your job!  I admire your creativity, but your execution needs some work!" Mari explains.

She plants a finger on my lips before I can protest any further and says, "Now, I know you're single, and desire a big strong woman in your life. Well, you're in luck, because I have the perfect woman for you.  She's headfast, powerful and...I'll do you one even better."

Mari leans into my ear and whispers, "She's a Minotaur. I've learned from my spies that you had a thing for bovine ladies, but this lady isn't just any Minotaur."

She takes her finger off of me and backs away. With a snap a portal appears behind her. A mamono falls through that makes me have plenty of regrets in my life.

This mamono is a Minotaur alright, but instead of her usual brown fur it's a dark purple. Her hair is red and spiky and her horns are black with spikes covering them. Her weapon is a large morningstar of a twisted design. Her eyes glow with pink intensity and they're staring directly at me.

"Have fun Lloyd Uram," Mari says in my full name.

I don't spend anymore time in that spot. I'm charging down the hill chugging a speed potion in case anything went awry with the plan. I feel my legs speed up, but this puts me on equal footing with the pursuing Minotaur who would have already caught me had I not drank that potion.

Of course, the super speed effect is only temporary, so the best that I can do is run in circles delaying the inevitable.

"We can do this all day stud!" the corrupted Minotaur shouts after me. I wish.

As a plus though, Duhrum didn't become a demon realm. The minus is that I'm about to get roughed up by a Minotaur and then get married once the effects of the speed potion run which should be happening right about...now.

Hey, I have a new powerful bodyguard now so I guess I can't complain too much.