Board Thread:What Would You Do?/@comment-28718853-20181023004315/@comment-36855838-20181104025925

LorialetDreamer wrote: That's aproblem I often encounter when reading your reply JustThereToWrite, but I have a really really hard time understanding your story. It's really hard to keep track of what's going on, sometime, character are doing something, then the second after they are doing something else or completely change their mind or something like that.

This story is a good exemple :

" Let's go you two, we need to head to my ship, I'll need supplies. "

Why he sudently talk to them so casually while he just meet them? Weren't they litteraly trying to attack him? This is this kind of suddent and innapropriate behaviour I often see in your stories, It feel so suddent, like you just tried to quickly settled the situation.

Sorry if I sound disobliging, and I'm not good at writing at all, but after seeing so many of your stories, I just really wanted to pointed this out.

Okay, so I could've done that better.

To clarify, "Harold" has been travelling awhile, met several eldritch beings, some hostile, others not, and even fought them before.

The Eldritch things can telepathically translate, but it causes headaches, slowly altering the minds of those they speak to.

Since they've crashed into a cave, and there's no point in fighting them weaponless (shoggoth is a slime, she's engaged in an odd symbiosis with the bat, and the bat's non-hostile) he decides to start over with a genuinely nice approach.