Thread:HoundTheDestroyer93/@comment-28358106-20170520185040/@comment-28358106-20170521225703

"MMRMPH MRF MMRF SMM MMFF MF MF RHHMFF!" I shout with my mouth still full of jelly doughnut. [Translation: "Get that man up to eight times the normal amount or he'll be drop dead sober!]

The nurse doesn't understand me, so I rush to a statue of Eros on a shelf. Grabbing its left boob causes a secret panel to open in the wall. I reach inside and grab a heavy iron strongbox with a skull and crossbones on it.

Waving my hand, my arcanum opens the box. I gingerly reach inside and lift out a black velvet bag. Opening the bag, I pull out a bottle with an amber liquid inside that, if it had eyes, would be staring daggers at me. I reverently hold it up so the label can be seen. It reads:

SIGFRIED HOSSENFOFFER'S MIDNIGHT GOOSE

763% ALCOHOL BY VOLUME, ACCOUNTING FOR INTERDIMENSIONAL TAMPERING

(Warning: May cause death, followed by resurrection, followed by second death, followed by random scrambling of the next seventy to eleven thousand seconds of dimensional mutation by imbiber)

I rear back and throw the bottle to Marcus. It arcs through the air in slow motion...