User blog:Twilight Sparkle the Alicorn/A response on Repter's Shirohebi WWYD

''(WWYD based on Artwork #9)

You've found an abandoned temple while searching for a place to get out of the rain, while exploring said temple you find a women bound and tied in a lower chamber with what appears to be magic seals around and two talismen attached to her, upon closer inspection you notice that sh'e a Shriohebi, she looks up at you with pleading eyes.

"Please help me a serpent cult trapped me here a few days ago, they plan to use me for some ritual, please help." the Shriohebi begs of you, tears falling from her eyes.

WWYD?''

""This must be a sign of the great luck!" I think as I murder her. I make sure to be careful, as any wrong cut would severely hinder the movement capability of the corpse; furthermore, I prefer the minimalistic approach: visible seams and scars all around her body do little good to her ability to disguise and infiltrate, not to mention her beauty. Aye, as you might have already guessed, I'm a necromancer. No, actually, more like "Hepatitis A., the Necromancer!". Sounds much more mighty with the exclamation mark.

Now, where were we? Ah, yes, the white snake girl. So far, so good: she would make a perfect undead servant, a lower class Disguised Lich (TM). Those are ideal for any espionage, for they are nearly indistinguishable from a normal being: they can, although don't need to, breathe, properly digest food, excrete; their looks are just the same (all thanks to my hands of gold and the minimalistic preparation technique sharpened over the years of unmoral experimentation), they don't fear these "holy" energies those pesky "good" gods provide, and, most importantly, they retain memories and the personality of the subject (years of academic studies on mind manipulation worked out well for me, mwhahaha), however, this is only true if the corpse is fresh, to say the least: it needs to be alive by the time you (and by "you" I mean "I", since "you" have no knowledge, not to mention skill to create a proper Disguise Lich (TM). The best 'you' can do is the lower body of a frog crawling around wildly) "reanimate" it.

Having finished in five minutes four seconds thirty three milliseconds (it's the Multiversal Record for making Disguised Liches (TM), just so you know), I look upon the fruits of my labor. The pretty scales are covering her I mean, its slender body, especially the muscular backside. Its white, albeit a little pink-flavored, silk hair was falling down on he its volumous, rich chest, and the bottomless, pitch black eyes (oh, wait, I'm mistaken, they're just crimson red. But it did have a (nec)romantic sound to it, didn't it?) full of death and inescapable DOOM, were staring at me. Now, I wonder if I should check my flawless sewing for enduring the casual mechanic tension?

I reach its silk-like skin with my hands, trying it, as if giving a hard massage. Carefully, I move up onto her its near-perfect spheres, which are strange for a snake to even have. As I grope them, it lets out a low, ecstatic moan of pleasure. I wonder if I could...

...

No, I should at least let the demonic energy inside it be properly organized by the negative essences of death before I could do that. Besides, the cultists should be still somewhere around the temple. Why havent I got a wife yet.

Ensured in the superb, divine quality of my masterpiece, I leave it in place, unnoticeably spoiling the seals holding it. Whoever those cultists are, they are incredibly unfortunate to appear at my path, for they shall now join my dark army of the undead, and their riches shall become joined with mine in the intimate atmosphere of my hidden vault, hehe.

The ambush went just as planned, and the spoils were mine to take. Now, my recent, perfect creation was ready for its second mission: a carefully engineered and thoroughly detailed (by none other than me) plan of infiltrating the Ryu shrine by the nearby village. Even though I'm a travelling necromancer (no, Hepatitis A., The Travelling Necromancer!), it's of a great help to have a few... thousand villages... and towns secretly backing you up. Admiring my Disguised Lich (TM) for the last time, I let out a sorrowful, frustrated sigh and ordered it to the village shrine. Perhaps I really should have relieved the great stress accumulated from my tough work using this very beautiful fruit of my hard labor, after all...

But it's time to move on in order to reach my next stop before sunrise. Screw the Demon Lord and those brainless fanatics of the Chief God, I shall have the Disjunction spell (or, far better, the True version) first, and then they would listen to me, those profanes in the magic arts, clinging to their brute, crude Global Enchantments. If only I had that much mana they used up for casting them, not to mention the upkeep costs in all those 374 years, I would have conquered more than one world already!"

Seventh day of the fourth month, year 374 of the Mamono calendar, written at Zipangu, entry 214 of the diary of Hepatitis A., The Travelling Necromancer!