User blog:The Vaudevillain Veteran/Humans from another world: Case Study 4: Diego Santana

A/N Will contain some profanity.

Location: Guadalajara, Mexico

Buenas dias beautiful people, my name is Diego Gonzalo Santana Rodriguez. I`m a 21 year old is also 5'7. I have messy shoulder length black hair, caramel skin and a goatee. I come from a poor family that has always struggled to get by but right now I`m currently in a relationship with a very wealthy woman who is 18 years older than me.

Now you`re probably wondering how could a short guy who comes from a poor background have a rich girlfriend?

My secret? Natural charisma. My oratory skills are unparalleled. I won`t lie this isn`t my first girlfriend, nor will it be my last, as I`ve broken many hearts in the past.

The only thing that matters to me is money. They say that money can`t buy everything. Bullshit, those people who say that haven`t ever gone to bed hungry or lived in a house that leaked when it rained.

My family has even cut contact with me due to my "manipulative" nature and being a "pathological liar" as they call it. They say that by dating rich women only for their money makes me no better than said rich people who don`t care about us.

But I say screw that. You have to beat fire with fire if you ever wanna be successful in this world.

"Hola cariño, are you enjoying your new PlayStation 4?" My sugar momma Sylvia texts me on my phone. "Sì, muchas gracias for the PS4. I can`t wait to see you again mio amor." I text her back. You know sometimes women make it too easy for me, just for some sex Sylvia bought me a new apartment.

I get up from my bed and head to the kitchen to make myself some breakfast. Only instead I`m greeted with a portal in my living room.

"Què?" I say in disbelief, on the other side of the portal I vaguely see what appears to be a forest with mushroom trees. My interest peaked I walk into the portal and arrive on some mushroom planet. The portal then closes behind me.

"Ah great, now I`m stuck on some mushroom planet. I hope I don`t encounter any fat Italian plumbers or have to rescue princesses from castles." I remark sarcastically to an invisible audience. With no apparent way back I am forced to explore this bizarre world. In the distance I see people in the middle of some party. One of the partygoers appears to be a woman with purple hair wearing a green top hat and drinking what I assume is tea and the other one is a woman with pink hair and pink bunny ears. The most peculiar thing about this party however is the amount of people currently engaged in sex.

"The hell is wrong with these people?" I say bewildered.

"Found you." A woman`s voice whispers into my ear.

I don`t have time to react as a pair of arms grab me from behind and pull me into some weird white dimension. "Who are you and where the hell am I?" I ask aggressively.

"Sorry about that, my name is Scarlett and you are in my card dimension. The place we were in just now is called Wonderland." She answers me.

"Wonderland, isn`t that place fictional though?" I ask Scarlett.

"Nope, Wonderland is real, very real." She reassures me.

My neck is then pecked by kisses, and Scarlett kisses me on the lips. We stay like that for a good 2 minutes until we seperated for air. "Was that good?"Scarlett asks me, her face beet red.

"The best." I answer, we continue to make love in Scarlett`s card dimension, until she tells me she has to go report to the so called "Queen of Hearts". So we head through one of her cards that lead us to some card themed castle.

"My Queen, Scarlett here at your duty." she says with a bow.

I already hear this Queen of Hearts shreiking about her play time being interrupted. After she`s done with her temper tantrum she finally turns her attention to me and Scarlett.

"Hohoho, it looks like you finally found your husband." she says playfully while looking at me. "My my, a fine specimen you are, tell me what is your name?" she asks me.

I`ve only just met this Queen of Hearts and I already feel something bubbling inside me.

Its....

Dislike

I always hated people who acted like they were better than everyone else. Especially spoiled brats like the one in front of me. Thankfully spoiled brats have big egos that can be stroked with the right words.

"My name is Diego Santana your majesty. You have a very beautiful castle may I say, it`s almost as beautiful as you." I say in my most over the top voice whilst bowing to her. I put on a fake smile but deep down I`m seething with anger.

Wow! What a gentleman." the Queen says blushing. "Scarlett you`ve really struck gold with Diego, as promised I`ll give you one day off to enjoy your new husband." The Queen announces with that annoying smirk on her face.

"Come on Diego, I still wanna show you the rest of Wonderland." Scarlett tells me enthusiastically. We then embark on our "tour" of Wonderland and witness... many interesting things to say the least. After our tour ends we return to Scarlett`s card dimension.

"Hey Scarlett, what did you say you were again?" I ask her.

"A Trumpart." she answers me.

"Are there any more of these 'mamono' you speak of?" I ask her again.

"Yes, over 200 different species in fact. There is even a book dedicated to it." she says happily and with a snap of her fingers, a large brown book appears in her hand. I try and grab it but just before I can, Scarlett yanks it away from me.

"Nah uh uh, you can read that tomorrow. Tonight I want you to focus on me and me only." she says in a sultry tone and pushes me onto her bed.

The Next Day:

I wake up feeling groggy from last night, however instead of Scarlett there is a note next to me that reads:

Dear Diego:

I am sorry you couldn`t wake up next to me. The Queen called all of us to her castle reasoning that it was an urgent matter. I promise I`ll be back as soon as possible my sweet.

Love

Scarlett

PS: The book is on the table for you to read.

"Alright time to finally read this book." I say as I open the first page of the Monster Girl Encyclopedia.

2 and a half hours later and I`ve finished reading the entire book including the Fallen Maidens stories. While I did find it weird and a bit funny at how these "heroes" of Lescatie were transformed into nymphomaniacs. One story in particular bothered me.

"Mio Dios, what in the actual fuck..."

I put the book down on the bed, my hands shaking in anger. I have just finished the story of a girl by the name of Mimil Miltie. A girl no older than 12 who was forcibly turned into some tentacle witch monster

"Those sick fucks.. how can they do that to her? She`s just a FUCKING CHILD!" I roar in rage as my fist makes contact with the wall.

I admit I`m no saint myself. I may be a liar, cheater and stealer but if there`s one thing I`ll never be in this world is a child molester.

I pick up the book again to finish it. Apparently this Lescatie place is now ruled by a puppet king and queen by the name of Elt and Francisca and that Druella is actually the one pulling the strings. The Queen of Hearts is the older sister of Druella and their parents are the Lilith the current Demon Lord and some hero who betrayed humanity just so he could get some poon.

I`ve learned all I could from this book, and I now realised that if I want to prevent these monsters from enslaving humanity I`d need a base of operations, but where do I start?

"Thats it!"

The idea finally clicked in my head. I would first need to overthrow the Queen of Hearts first to begin my plan to save humanity. Although I`d need to gain the loyalty of her Trumparts.

I noticed that when I first met the Queen she always had a deck of cards on her person, so if I could find a way to steal her cards and learn how they work, then maybe my plan to take over Wonderland could work.

But for now, I`ll bide my time and play along until the time is right.