Board Thread:What Would You Do?/@comment-28718853-20180403152732/@comment-28358106-20180403211512

I hold my hands up. "Ladies, ladies, please! Everyone just calm down!"

"Tell us your sign!" The Dragon yells.

"Yeah! Tell us!" The Mouse pipes.

I take off my chef hat and scratch my head. "Sign? What sign?  What do you mean, the sign of my restaurant?"

"No, dummy! How old are you?" The Werewolf says.

"Me? Well, er...thirty-eight?" I shrug.

"Ha! Eat it, bitches!  Hahahaha!" The Kakuen leaps up on the table and begins to moon the others, who look crestfallen.

"Fine. Let's move on," the Centaur sighs.

"Suits me." The Hakutaku raises her baton and begins pointing at each of the other Mamono in turn, each disappearing with a *PAFF* and a small cloud of colored smoke. All the others gone, she looks at me, almost spitefully, before poofing out of existence herself.

The Kakuen pulls her skirt up and hops off the table, sauntering towards me. "Well, well, looks like this is my lucky day..." She sports a wide grin.

"Wh...what in the world was that all about?" I say, as she unbuttons my shirt.

"Nothing, sweetie. Just a lil' zodiac fun," she coos. "Spirits of the years, some kinda magic mumbo jumbo. We wander through the world, trying to find a husband, one of us for each sign.  I leave, another replaces me.  It's a kind of benevolent curse from the Mist Continent."

"Zodiac? What zodiac?" I begin to squirm, trying to pry my shirt out of her hands. "I've never been to the Mist Continent! How does this have anything to do with me??"

"Well, it---"


 * POOF*

-WHAM!-

The two Mersharks appear and fall to the table, landing among the platters of food with a squeak and a yelp.

"Yarr, this be the worst entrance ever! Where's me matey?" The first shouts, flopping.

"I'm behind you! Stop slapping me with your tail!" The second wails.

The Kakuen spins around and pouts at me tearfully, balling her fists up. "You should have kept your big mouth shut!"

Poof. She disappears.

I look at the two Mersharks, who have now flopped over and are both looking at me with curious expressions.

"Um, before we get married, please tell me you live by the sea?" The younger, softer one says.

"Wait, lass! Look!" The older Mershark grins a toothy grin, pointing to the huge lobster tank on the back wall. "Dinner!"

"Yay!" The first one throws her arms up.

I sigh. Being a Pisces has always had its challenges.