User blog comment:ArmInAss/Famous Last Words..../@comment-26219553-20150413111619


 * walking home from shitty Friday at work, get intercepted by ogre that's been stalking me all week despite various fortunate circumstances letting me escape each time*

Ogre: "Hey, there, little guy. Fancy meeting you here~"

Me: "Oh, for god's sake, just- please, get out of the way."

Ogre: *looms over me and grins lecherously, before shoving me back a step* "Make me."

Me: *vein visibly pops on my forehead* "...fuck it. I could do with hitting someone. Let's go."


 * shrug off my coat and backpack, initiate fight music *


 * somehow, through a combination of luck, bloodlust and pent up rage, I win the fight*

Me: *comes down from combat high* "Whew... hah... haaah... I won. I WON! YEEEAH! UP YOURS, YOU CRAZY STALKER BIT-"

Ogre: *gets her second wind, tackles me down and tears off my clothes* "God, that was the best fight I've had in AGES! Round two. NOW."

Due to having spent all my energy on the previous bloodrage, I promptly get the shit kicked/raped out of me and am dragged back to her lair.