User blog:Gnomehunter/Day 28: No-Nut November Challenge Undead Edition

No-Nut November

Write a story with an undead-type monster

Every single undead type of monster girl reacting one way or another to the aforementioned meme. The species of each scenario us not mentioned but I believe the majority are easily identifiable, with the remainder being down to process of elimination.

“Are you going to be participating in no nut november this year?”

“For sure. But there’s no reason why you have to suffer”.

“What do you mean?” Joe stuck out his tongue.

“There’s plenty of ways we can still have fun even if I’m trying to abstain”.

As the month nears its final few days, a little girl hides in the corner of the room. She manages to wedge herself under the small side table next to the couch, her husband completely unaware of her presence. ‘At least he won’t discover my secret’. She thinks to herself. But maybe she rather that he did.

---

“Husband, I have finished my preparations for allowing you the best chance to succeed during no nut november, as you called it”.

“What exactly did you do?”

“I completely cleaned the house out of food products that were made with or contained nuts”.

“Babe. I don’t think you quite understand the meaning of no nut november”.

“What other meaning could it possibly have?”

---

“So you’re trying to avoid hehe, nutting for a month?”

“That’s the idea”.

“OK! You have fun with that”.

“W-whoa haha s-stop sucking on my earohmygod that feels so good”.

“Doesn’t it? Feel free to give up on that silly little game at any time and I’ll make you feel even better”.

---

“What. Did. You. Just. Tell. Me?” Flames billow up from below her skirt, as she eyed her husband with an intense and frightening gaze.

“I was, uh, well it’s a funny internet meme, you gotta go for a whole month with nutting”. He was starting to have serious regrets about even proposing the idea. Clang! The cage slammed shut behind him.

“Honey...Darling...Sweetheart...I don’t know what gave you that idea...But I am going to keep you here until you’ve thoroughly rid yourself of the idea”.

---

“So it’s a challenge based on abstaining for a month”. His girlfriend stared at him blankly. “So uh, what do you think?”

“I don’t like it”. She replied.

“Oh we’ll just see how long we can go for”.

He awoke the next morning, his eyes shot open the sounds of rattling and click-clacking, and the sweet pleasure of his embrace. “That was pretty fast”.

“I was hungry”.

---

“You don’t want to give me any more spirit energy?”

“Well no, it’s about not ejaculating for a month”.

“The two are one and the same”, her voice quivers as tears start to roll down her cheeks.

“Oh, sweetheart, it’s not anything you’ve done, it’s something I want to try for my own sake. It’s like a challenge someone came up with”.

“Who could have been so cruel as to come up with something that would separate monster girls from their husbands?” She was sobbing now, barely able to stand.

“Oh, sweetheart, come here, I didn’t mean to upset you. Look, we’ll call the whole thing off ok?”

---

He placed a slip of paper on her head that read “freeze”.

“Master, I don’t understand the purpose of this order”.

“There’s a little challenge that some people talk about for the month of november. It’s simple. Don’t bust a nut for the whole month. This way, you won’t be able to stop me”.

“I don’t think I like the sound of that”. He gave her a kiss.

“Not to worry, my love. After that comes destroy dick december”.

November 25th found him looking frantically for his wife. “I left her right here!” How could she have moved?”

“ARGH!”

“AAAAAAUUUGHHH” She launched herself out of the closet and tackled him to the ground, a “lust” talisman affixed to her hat.

“How did you get free!”

“An intervention from the Demon Lord? A chance gust of wind? It matters not. I think december is coming early this year”.

---

“Husband. My whole body feels dried out. It’s uncomfortable. Please, won’t you cease this silly game and satisfy my needs?”

“It was the King’s order that every man partake. It’s a challenge for us as well, but we will  bear it together”.

“Maybe I’ll come over there and take it myself?”

“Try that and I’ll tickle you”.

---

A beautiful violet lamia is dragged into the throne room by highly irate guards.

“Your Majesty, please forgive me, I swear I wasn’t plotting anything, why, your guards found me five kilometers from the kingdom border I was just going for a stroll surely you can’t punish me on the grounds of being too close to your domain?” The queen stared at her prisoner with an unsympathetic gaze.

“Doubtful that I am that you just happened to be near my kingdom and had no plans to take my place, you are correct. No just ruler would take pleasure in punishing someone before a crime had even taken place. But I have not brought you here for punishment. I have brought you here to ask for your help”.

“My help? You need me? Now what could such a mighty ruler with a humble little lamia like myself?” She reared up on her coils, then stretched and unwound her tail, smiling at the thought of her greatest rival asking for her help.

“You are skilled in infiltration? In bringing structured entities to ruins?”

“Goodness when you put it like that it sounds awfully unflattering. But I suppose that summarizes my skill set”.

“Then I need you to break into my husband’s room. He sealed himself up on the first of the month and even I have not been able to break in”.

“What in the name of the Demon Lord did he do that for?”

“He made a decree on the last day of October that every man in the kingdom should partake in ‘No-Nut November’. It is an abstinence based challenge that requires a man to prevent the release of spirit energy for all of November. And I have been at my wits end trying to get my servants to cooperate. The anubi are struggling to keep schedules straight. The mummies are drying up. I want you to break into that room, pump my husband full of poison and ravish him until he begs for mercy and agrees to lift that silly decree. I have attempted to order both him and my servants’ husbands to cease and copulate, but they have truly taken to heart his command and will not obey”.

“And...just why should I help you? It seems he’s doing a better job than I ever could”.

“If you choose to help me and are successful, then I will welcome you as a wife of my husband. If you refuse I will throw you in the dungeon until December”.

“Eep! Well, I guess I’ll go and take a look at that door”.

---

“Oh my. That is an interesting proposition”. She pondered his proposal. “Well, I will need more of your delicious blood in order to compensate. But If that’s what you want to do, you’re welcome to try. If you can stand it”. She smiled teasingly, nibbling on his neck.

---

“Husband? It’s been days since you’ve taken me”. A trail of liquid ran down her leg.

“It’s no nut november. I’m trying to abstain for a whole month”.

“But how will we make children?”

“It’s only for one month”.

“I don’t think I can wait that long”. She embraced him, her soft flesh pressing against him, wings enveloping him, then she pulled him into a kiss, breathing out a strange smelling gas directly into his mouth.

---

“My lady, I have come to you with a proposal”.

“And what could that proposal be?” He whispered it into her ear.

“My! That is quite a strange idea you have, darling. But if you want to try, I don’t see any reason to stop you. I will extract the necessary spirit energy from my touch. But I’m not sure how pleasant it will be for you”.

---

“Very well, husband, I will endeavor to support you, even if I don’t understand its purpose”.

“Oh, just keep your head on straight and it should be smooth sailing”. He chuckled to himself.

November fourth. “Watch out for that branch!”

“Ahhh, no, my head”, she uttered in a dry, disinterested tone. Her head was knocked cleanly off her shoulders, and the body ran straight for him. As he lay on the ground, her head watching from a short distance with a blissful smile, he tried to glare at her.

“You did that on purpose!”

---

November 30 slipped away at the stroke of midnight. He lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. “I guess I won no nut november. Yay for me”. Suddenly, a transparent white figure floated through his wall, glowing softly. He sat up, ready to run, when he saw that it was in the shape of a lovely young woman.

“Oooooohhhhh an unmarried man...I’ve been trying to find one for weeks but it seems like they’re all taken. Hey, how would you like to satisfy this little lady’s wildest desires?” She was looming over him, the lewdest grin on her face he’d ever seen.

“Sounds like an offer I can’t refuse!”

“Good, then if you’ll bear with me awhile”. She leaned close to his chest and vanished inside. He gasped as her every single thought and desire became clear to him. She reappeared, looking more solid this time. “Now are you ready?” He touched her face, finding it like cool, smooth skin. He leaned in and gave her a kiss, her lips cool and soft.

“I can’t wait to get started”.

---

“Waaaarrrrm. Huuusssssbannnd”. The horde lurched after the man, who was werving and dodging them as best he could.

“Just get to the gate. They can’t get me then. I’m not going to lose!” But as he sprinted past the last row of headstones, something caught his foot. He screamed as he tripped and went skidding into the ground. “Ouch”, he croaked, trying to recover from the fall. But his wife was upon him.

“Huuuusssbannnd. I am coooold. My sissssssters are cooooold. Pleeeeaase warm usssss”.

---

“So I’ve got a little idea I want to try”.

“Oh I always love your ideas, darling. Perhaps an inspiration for my next performance?”

“Um. Well, maybe. It’s called no nut november. It’s a challenge where men abstain from sex for a whole month. Well, more specifically no ejaculation”. She smiled and clapped her hands together.

“That sounds wonderful!”

“You’re taking that a lot better than I thought you would”. He said, puzzled at her reaction.

“Oh what a splendid hook! The protagonist has been cruelly separated from his beloved, and unable to consummate their love for each other!”

“No, it’s uh, something that I’m going to do”.

“And suddenly he’s dropped into the tentacle forest where he is forced to make a grueling choice! Remain true to her, or succumb to the tentacle plants’ devilish encouragement”.

“Honey? I don’t think you understood! It’s not for a play!” He was beginning to panic. His wife was gone, and his surroundings began to take the form of a luscious, verdant forest. His heart skipped a beat as he felt something long and slimy grasping his arms.

---

“My dearest and most loyal servant! I have called you here today so that we may initiate our trial. What may prove to be the greatest trial we have ever faced!”

“Whatever ails you, my Lord, I will serve by your side”.

“Fall has long passed, the harvest is complete, and the sky grows darker. We are not long from the days of bitter cold. The month of November brings a period of abstinence. This is what all true warriors strive for!”

“My Lord, I do not understand”.

“I will be abstaining from pleasure, in order to temper my spirit. You will not spoil my pursuit of this noble goal, do you understand?”

“Yes, my Lord. I will remain faithful to your cause”.

He stalked the halls of his castle. His brow furrowed in concentration, and more than a little irritation. She had spoken openly of her support, of course. Nor would she attempt to lay her hands on him. But she had taken to lingering in the same room as him, posing, stretching, and showing off her body. Something which was growing more alluring by the day. She took her place next to him at night, and he awoke to find her in compromising positions, eyes fixed on him as if begging for him to break his oath. He had considered ordering her away for a time, but thought better of it. It would give her a great sense of satisfaction to know what kind of sway she could hold.

“My love”, he murmured. “I can see what you’re doing. But you will not best me”.