Talk:Dark Elf/@comment-26017717-20160413093334

I think most people misunderstand the dark elves. The main point of BDSM is not to make a person suffer or feel fear, the point is to make the sub feel like the dom is in control.

Inflicting pain is one method of achieving this, but it can't just be randomly wipping, it has to be put in a context, like a "stick and carrot" scenario for example (good pet, you took three lashes, now you get a deepthroat as a reward).

Also, pain is only one part, there are lots of way to display dominance and control other then pain. For example, giving a footjob while saying something like "Look how easily I can make you hard using only my feet, you would be turned on by any part of my body wouldn't you? That's so cute" or "I can kiss and lick you anywere I want and you can't stop me, but I will only use the tip of my tongue and blow cold air on the wetness until you beg me to use my whole tongue and mouth to lovingly caress you".

Ultimately, it's a roleplay based on trust. The sub wants to be able to feel that the dom controls their body, but would never actually hurt them for real. This is what makes it exciting when the dom does something that you would normally be scared of/want to avoid, and make you feel safe and aroused while doing it. Needless to say, it takes a lot of skill to be a good dom, hence why they train their kids diligently.