Board Thread:What Would You Do?/@comment-28718853-20190407153358/@comment-29325824-20190408165447

Great, here I was just taking a little stroll at the local farmer's market, looking for stuff to sell and buy, when this happens. As the horde of ferocious Ocelomeh approaches, the combat capable men and Mamono wives quickly rush to defend themselves, their children, and their livelihood. As we're starting to get overrun by the determined and horny mass, I quickly pull out my (enchanted) rape whistle and blow on it like my life depends on it. I could try to fight, but I'm a pacifist. Aka a coward who pats himself on the back.

While the Ocelomeh are initially confused, it quickly wears off when they are mowed down by a rain of demon silver bullets. Out of one of the stores my trusty Automaton bodyguard/wife emerges in full on combat mode. While she reloads, another wave of Ocelomeh approaches, before they are (non-fatally) stuck down by lightning. As they look up, a Ryu & Otohime in their dragon form circle overhead, and a Dhampir, two Golems, and a nine-tailed Inari jump off of their backs and surround me.

As the Ocelomeh and villagers just stare in awe, I just shrug and say "My wives are highly protective", as a one-sided asskicking ensues.

After all the Ocelomeh are incapacitated, a Lich teleports in, heals everyone else, and teleports me and the rest of my harem back home. But not before leaving a timed gas bomb of concentrated Raging Mushroom powder behind. However, back home Kiki and Shoggy chan ground me for the forseeable future, sternly stating that it's too dangerous for me to go outside alone.