Thread:Flodoomable/@comment-24026095-20170501060709/@comment-5426290-20170501145705

4. It wasn't related to American/British speech.. Hmm.. Examples..

The present-past tense was a bit jumbled in places. [She was wearing a thin strip of black cloth] [Her thong is so tiny]

The bits of backstory that were so long it kinda interrupted the whole story. [''You gasp at her revelation and leap up, running across the bed intending to jump over her head and then get to the door. The element of surprise might work here, since you weren’t as fast as your mum. You just might be able to get to the door and unlock it if she didn’t expect you to leap over her head. You were pretty athletic. 'It’s how you got away from the (human) teacher who said she would punish you in detention one afternoon. Not wanting to stay bored out of your mind in school even after three o’clock, you slipped out and scaled the school’s wire fence even as she was below yelling at you to come back, and then leaped down to the other side without a scratch. You waved cheekily to your teacher as you left, sniggering as she kept screaming from inside the school boundaries saying she’d have you expelled for that. At least take a picture or two, honey.''']

The confusing discriptions. one moment you're thrown on the bed, the next moment you're still to be thrown on the bed. [At least, that’s what you thought before your seven-foot okāsan ''reached out and calmly grabbed you around your knees. She quickly flipped you around and pushed you on your butt, sending you flying back to the bed.'' You flailed your arms and legs as you sailed through the air. No! Not the bed! Not the fucking bed!]

You know, stuff like that.