User blog comment:Altenativefuturefan27/Help Developing a Fic/Need Ideas?/@comment-24695597-20141218015349/@comment-86.100.116.109-20141218183502

Well, I checked it out and it dose have potential. A very good start it would be for the second plot idea. But the grammar and writing style need to be cleaned up a bit. It was a bit hard to read, but if fixed, it would definitely be good.