Talk:Dormouse/@comment-25095137-20140815194452/@comment-25035274-20140816043303

...Dormouse? The DORMOUSE?! My eternal nemesis has arrived to torment me once again?! Not content with stealing my bed, now she's trying to steal my lap?!

I absolutely can NOT stand for this! Partly because I'm sitting. Clearly, this calls for drastic measures.

I stand. Not for this, though. I stand for something else. Something far greater. I stand, that I might have final victory over my most hated of enemies! For by standing...I destroy my lap. For it is far better that my lap be destroyed than claimed by that...that...that mouse! She may have taken my bed, but she'll never have my lap, no no!

In destruction, my lap finds salvation! But what good salvation, when it comes with the loss of my greatest treasure? My lap. My lap. My poor, now vanished lap.